The Question

“The tempest in many ways depicts Shakespeare’s waning literary powers. His hero takes the help of supernatural elements to bring justice to his daughter, which in a way was also an act of revenge, albeit in a subdued tone. Now we see his brother an as usurper, a grave crime in the eyes of every man, the very same eyes which approve of the accolades given to several conquerors throughout history. Therefore, boys, when you read, remember that every character suffers from shades of grey and cannot be compartmentalized into definitive heroes and villains. Any questions?” The teacher paused for breath. My hand shot up.

“Yes, Abhijnan, go ahead. What is your question? ”

“Miss, may I please go to the toilet?”

There was a moment of stunned silence and a frosty glare from her as the class waited with bated breath for an opportunity to laugh at this abomination of a question. It never came.

 

I was thrown out of the class.

 

 

 

 

p.s. In my Alma Mater we called the lady teachers ‘Miss’ and yeah we had to ask for permission to go to the toilet.

 

The Musical…

It was mesmerizing. The panorama of colours, both bright and subdued was breathtaking. Add to that the enchanting music and there was the perfect recipe for an experience of a lifetime. The smash of violet across the stage every time the Stradivarius reached a crescendo seemed to transport the visibly gaping spectators to another world, where rats followed the trumpet man to the sea and Evil was out of the dictionary. The musical was an ‘orgasm for the eye and ear’ as one of one my friends called out in lurid exuberance in a later ‘on-the-rocks’ discussion.

It played for an hour and a half non-stop, the acting terrific and the story sublime and at the end of it, thunderous claps of appreciation boomed filled the tent as all spectators jumped to their feet to applaud the entourage.

Well not all spectators to speak the truth, actually it was all of them minus one….Me.

All that has been described above are words of my mother, who was also present with me in that tent on that day. As far as I am concerned, I couldn’t enjoy the show because I was in dire straits!!!I kept shifting around in my seat in a packed tent, looking for a way out of which there were none. You see, all I wanted to do was pee! And the situation arose because I, who has a small bladder, did not heed my mother’s words that a tent doesn’t have a toilet. When my mother understood my predicament, all she said was “How stupid can you be?”

She was right; HOW STUPID CAN I BE?